The parenting tips nobody tells you...
Hey Everyone :)
I decided I would write this post as a little helpful guide for all those mom-to-be's and anyone else planning on having a baby so listen up! If your a mom already you probably know exactly what I'm talking about. I really wish someone could of shared some of these while I was expecting I would of worried just a little less. These are just some things I've learned since having Cailan that I did not know beforehand.
#1. The number 1 thing I've learned is no child is ever the same so stop worrying about them and comparing them to other children. Every child is different from their likes/dislikes, personalities and temperaments. What's going to work for one is not necessarily going to work for another. I'm sure when your hearing a hundred and 1 different ways of doing something it can be over-whelming and you can start to doubt yourself an how your doing things and making you wonder if your doing it right? I know cause I've been there and its horrible. I'm not saying all advice is bad and not going to work it's just becoming a new mom is so exciting and if your putting your child's needs first then you cant really go wrong. Be confident in yourself and keep doing what your doing you are the one spending every last second with your baby nobody knows them as well as you do.
#2. My next piece of advice is get yourself and baby into a routine. I'm sure if you have a child already you will know the importance and benefits of having one. Most importantly a routine can give your child structure throughout the day and a certain sense of security as they know whats going to happen next. I was in a routine with Cailan since he was born! I was blessed that he was such a great sleeper and since he was about 3/4 months hes been sleeping nights and I really do put it down to the fact that myself and my partner really stuck hard at establishing a routine from the get-go. Whether you have a baby, toddler or child I promise you getting them into routine will allow you to do so much more with your day so you can plan better for them and you. They are so many benefits for your child like giving them a sense of time and helping them establish good habits like brushing their teeth and tidying up. I really could go on because I feel so strongly about this so if you would like to see a full post on the benefits of having a routine and also my own routine with Cailan please let me know!
#3. Sometimes its okay to say 'yes'! Omg this is something I really did learn first hand from having Cai and that it is completely fine to say yes every once and a while and not feel like you've failed as a parent! Like for example if your child is a lover of chocolate and all things sweat like mine then your probably trying to monitor really hard how much he or she gets of it every week. Like if your child has had a party or there was some sort of occasion where they attended and got sweets but came home with a party bag or something like that its okay to allow them that piece of chocolate or Haribo jellies their asking you for on repeat since they came home. It's okay! Or if your child is not a great sleeper and your trying to get them in routine but your having a stressful night with them where they just won't go down believe me whether their a good sleeper or not we've all had them nights don't stress yourself out. If you find yourself in that position don't let it get to the point where your ready to tear your hair out take them up, leave them run around and play for another 20 minutes then try them again. There is no definitive rule book to parenting were all only human at the end of the day.
#4. Don't give guilt the time of day! We are humans and we are flawed. Nobody's perfect and nobody's life is perfect 100% of the time. This is kind of a general one for everybody but in particular all you mom's out their. Stay at home mom's stop feeling guilty that your at home with your baby's and working mom's stop feeling guilty that your not. Your doing what you have to do for your family and that's okay, This is something I struggled with myself when I was working I felt guilty about leaving him at home and then when I was at home I felt guilty that I wasn't out working so that I could help to contribute towards the bills, rent etc. I know its not realistic all the time but try every now and again to just stop. Imagine what you could be doing with the time that your wasting feeling guilty over something. Guilt is just a feeling we conjure up within ourselves because of the assumption of how were supposed to be doing something according to someone else!
#2. My next piece of advice is get yourself and baby into a routine. I'm sure if you have a child already you will know the importance and benefits of having one. Most importantly a routine can give your child structure throughout the day and a certain sense of security as they know whats going to happen next. I was in a routine with Cailan since he was born! I was blessed that he was such a great sleeper and since he was about 3/4 months hes been sleeping nights and I really do put it down to the fact that myself and my partner really stuck hard at establishing a routine from the get-go. Whether you have a baby, toddler or child I promise you getting them into routine will allow you to do so much more with your day so you can plan better for them and you. They are so many benefits for your child like giving them a sense of time and helping them establish good habits like brushing their teeth and tidying up. I really could go on because I feel so strongly about this so if you would like to see a full post on the benefits of having a routine and also my own routine with Cailan please let me know!
#3. Sometimes its okay to say 'yes'! Omg this is something I really did learn first hand from having Cai and that it is completely fine to say yes every once and a while and not feel like you've failed as a parent! Like for example if your child is a lover of chocolate and all things sweat like mine then your probably trying to monitor really hard how much he or she gets of it every week. Like if your child has had a party or there was some sort of occasion where they attended and got sweets but came home with a party bag or something like that its okay to allow them that piece of chocolate or Haribo jellies their asking you for on repeat since they came home. It's okay! Or if your child is not a great sleeper and your trying to get them in routine but your having a stressful night with them where they just won't go down believe me whether their a good sleeper or not we've all had them nights don't stress yourself out. If you find yourself in that position don't let it get to the point where your ready to tear your hair out take them up, leave them run around and play for another 20 minutes then try them again. There is no definitive rule book to parenting were all only human at the end of the day.
#4. Don't give guilt the time of day! We are humans and we are flawed. Nobody's perfect and nobody's life is perfect 100% of the time. This is kind of a general one for everybody but in particular all you mom's out their. Stay at home mom's stop feeling guilty that your at home with your baby's and working mom's stop feeling guilty that your not. Your doing what you have to do for your family and that's okay, This is something I struggled with myself when I was working I felt guilty about leaving him at home and then when I was at home I felt guilty that I wasn't out working so that I could help to contribute towards the bills, rent etc. I know its not realistic all the time but try every now and again to just stop. Imagine what you could be doing with the time that your wasting feeling guilty over something. Guilt is just a feeling we conjure up within ourselves because of the assumption of how were supposed to be doing something according to someone else!
As a mom I am constantly learning about myself and my child and these are just some of the main lessons that I have learned so far. I hope you find these tips useful and if you think you might know someone who would benefit from reading this please tag away.
Until next time,
Lisa.
x
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